“Who rises from prayer a better man has forgotten something.”

“Wooden skulls don’t work for long.”

“I enjoy staring at the sea, but unlike other wanderers of the Brighton coast, who are careful to appear wistfully enriched by the phenomenon, I make a point of looking utterly baffled.”

“The authorities portrayed shock and outrage but never described what it was they had been expecting.”

“Stab me if you can enjoy it – but not if it feels like a duty.  Stab me vertically if I’m lying down and horizontally if I’m running.”

“Those who know do not speak, those who speak do not know. Thus wisdom remains uninherited.”

“I thought things couldn’t get any worse – that’s how young I was.”

“A key and a strangler – this is all a simple tale requires.”

“Notice the ears on either side of that apple? Now tell me the world’s not collapsing.”