IT’S ALRIGHT, THE MONKEYS ARE IN CHARGE NOW.

From an old BBC news report:

Monkeys invade Delhi government

Tuesday, 9 January, 2001,
14:38 GMT

Thousands of monkeys are invading government buildings in Delhi, forcing employees to arm themselves
with sticks and stones in case they are attacked.


    At least 10,000 monkeys are creating havoc in the Indian capital by barging into government offices, stealing food, threatening bureaucrats and even ripping apart valuable documents.

    The increasingly aggressive animals swing effortlessly between the offices of the defence, finance and external affairs ministries and some have even been spotted in the prime minister’s office.

    “They are moving in very high security areas,” says Defence Ministry officer, IK Jha.

    Officials say there is little that can be done.

    Killing the animals is not an option because monkeys are a sacred symbol in Hinduism, India’s main religion.

    The authorities used to capture the monkeys and ship them to neighbouring states, but this is no longer possible because other areas are now being over populated with monkeys.

    The government held a high-level meeting two years ago to solve the problem permanently.

    Suggestions ranged from setting up a separate park for captured monkeys to “monkey contraception.”

    Nothing has been done since then and employees still walk to work in fear of attack.
    
“I am sometimes faced with groups of monkeys, big huge looking fellows,” says government employee Surekha Rao. “What I do is make some noise with my shoes so the monkey moves away.”


    Animal rights activists say the main problem is not the rising number of monkeys but the growing population of humans.

    “We have encroached on their homelands, we have taken away their fruits, we have reduced their water sources and we are trapping them from their home range, from their forests, so they are coming to urban areas,” says rights activist Iqbal Malik.

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About Jay Babcock

I am an independent writer and editor based in Tucson, Arizona. I publish LANDLINE at jaybabcock.substack.com Previously: I co-founded and edited Arthur Magazine (2002-2008, 2012-13) and curated the three Arthur music festival events (Arthurfest, ArthurBall, and Arthur Nights) (2005-6). Prior to that I was a district office staffer for Congressman Henry A. Waxman, a DJ at Silver Lake pirate radio station KBLT, a copy editor at Larry Flynt Publications, an editor at Mean magazine, and a freelance journalist contributing work to LAWeekly, Mojo, Los Angeles Times, Washington Post, Vibe, Rap Pages, Grand Royal and many other print and online outlets. An extended piece I wrote on Fela Kuti was selected for the Da Capo Best Music Writing 2000 anthology. In 2006, I was somehow listed in the Music section of Los Angeles Magazine's annual "Power" issue. In 2007-8, I produced a blog called "Nature Trumps," about the L.A. River. From 2010 to 2021, I lived in rural wilderness in Joshua Tree, Ca.